marriage
Quotations
Quotations on the topic of ‘marriage’ from all listed authors (click on the ‘click to view listing’ links to view each quote in full).
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“I believe a marriage is between a man and a woman.” -George W. Bush
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“Marriage is like a game of chess except the board is flowing water, the pieces are made of smoke and no move you make will have any effect on the outcome.” -Jerry Seinfeld
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“A sense of humor is great – it goes a long, long way in a marriage.” -Chris Rock
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“Pink Floyd is like a marriage that’s on a permanent trial separation.” -Rick Wright
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“Courtship is to marriage, as a very witty prologue to a very dull play.” -William Congreve
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“The secret of a successful marriage is not to be at home too much.” -Colin Chapman
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“I’m done with men… I’m going to be alone. I have no luck with relationships. I don’t think I’m made for marriage.” -Halle Berry
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“Marriage is miserable unless you find the right person that is your soulmate and that takes a lot of looking.” -Marvin Gaye
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“Crucial to understanding federalism in modern day America is the concept of mobility, or ‘the ability to vote with your feet.’ If you don’t support the death penalty and citizens packing a pistol – don’t come to Texas. If you don’t like medicinal marijuana and gay marriage, don’t move to California.” -Rick Perry
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“A marriage without conflicts is almost as inconceivable as a nation without crises.” -Andre Maurois
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“I think like any marriage, especially when you’ve had divorced parents like myself you want to try even harder to make it work.” -Princess Diana
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“It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.” -Jane Austen
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“I would love to have the same rights as everybody else. I would love, I don’t care if it’s called marriage. I don’t care if it’s called, you know, domestic partnership. I don’t care what it’s called.” -Ellen DeGeneres
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“In terms of the legal matter of creating a contract between two people that’s called marriage, and allowing them to live together with the protection of law, it seems to me is the way we should be moving in this country.” -Colin Powell
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“Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads, which sew people together through the years.” -Simone Signoret
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“Marriage is distinctly and repeatedly excluded from heaven. Is this because it is thought likely to mar the general felicity?” -Samuel Butler
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“Never again! I can see no reason for marriage – ever at all. I’ve had it. Three times is enough.” -Ingrid Bergman
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“In mid-life the man wants to see how irresistible he still is to younger women. How they turn their hearts to stone and more or less commit a murder of their marriage I just don’t know, but they do.” -Earl Warren
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“Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.” -Dick Gregory
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“An affair now and then is good for a marriage. It adds spice, stops it from getting boring… I ought to know.” -Bette Davis
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“One should believe in marriage as in the immortality of the soul.” -Honore de Balzac
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“Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.” -Joey Adams
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“Even though people may be well known, they hold in their hearts the emotions of a simple person for the moments that are the most important of those we know on earth: birth, marriage and death.” -Jackie Kennedy
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“Marriage must be a relation either of sympathy or of conquest.” -George Eliot
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“Even in the common affairs of life, in love, friendship, and marriage, how little security have we when we trust our happiness in the hands of others!” -William Hazlitt
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“Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce.” -P. J. O’Rourke
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“Romantic love is an illusion. Most of us discover this truth at the end of a love affair or else when the sweet emotions of love lead us into marriage and then turn down their flames.” -Thomas Moore
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“Not cohabitation but consensus constitutes marriage.” -Marcus Tullius Cicero
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“First love is first love, first marriage is first marriage, disappointment is disappointment.” -Maximilian Schell
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“In marriage do thou be wise: prefer the person before money, virtue before beauty, the mind before the body then thou hast a wife, a friend, a companion, a second self.” -William Penn
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“Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the ‘will of the people’ goes out the window.” -Bill Maher
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“Children are supposed to help hold a marriage together. They do this in a number of ways. For instance, they demand so much attention that a husband and wife, concentrating on their children, fail to notice each other’s faults.” -Richard Armour
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“More belongs to marriage than four legs in a bed.” -Rainer Maria Rilke
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“A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.” -Jim Samuels
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“I’m so wrapped up in my work that it’s often impossible to consider other things in my life. My marriage ended in divorce because of this, my relationship with Holly has suffered by this.” -Jim Carrey
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“Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.” -Henny Youngman
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“My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.” -Rodney Dangerfield
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“Marriage is a very good thing, but I think it’s a mistake to make a habit out of it.” -W. Somerset Maugham
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“I think what makes our marriage work amid all the glare is that my husband is my best friend. He inspires everything in my life and enables me to do the best that I can. I want to hang out with him more than anyone.” -Faith Hill
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“The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all the time.” -Julia Child
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“Anyone who thinks that the vice-president can take a position independent of the president of his administration simply has no knowledge of politics or government. You are his choice in a political marriage, and he expects your absolute loyalty.” -Hubert H. Humphrey
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“The Bible is clear – God’s definition of marriage is between a man and a woman.” -Billy Graham
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“Every marriage is a mystery to me, even the one I’m in. So I’m no expert on it.” -Hillary Clinton
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“Marriage has a unique place because it speaks of an absolute faithfulness, a covenant between radically different persons, male and female and so it echoes the absolute covenant of God with his chosen, a covenant between radically different partners.” -Rowan D. Williams
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“Marriage is a great institution.” -Elizabeth Taylor
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“Marriage brings one into fatal connection with custom and tradition, and traditions and customs are like the wind and weather, altogether incalculable.” -Soren Kierkegaard
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“For it is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together. Our friends seldom profit us but they make us feel safe. Marriage is a scheme to accomplish exactly that same end.” -H. L. Mencken
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“All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest – never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership.” -Ann Landers
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“Culture, what you believe, what you value, how you live matters. Now, as fundamental as these principles are, they may become topics of democratic debates from time to time, so it is today with the enduring institution of marriage. Marriage is a relationship between a man and a woman.” -Mitt Romney
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“In marriage, a man becomes slack and selfish, and undergoes a fatty degeneration of his moral being.” -Robert Louis Stevenson
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“I’m not for gay marriage, but I’m not for discriminating against people.” -Joel Osteen
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“Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.” -Bertrand Russell
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“Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.” -Leonardo da Vinci
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“In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage.” -Robert Anderson
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“Experts on romance say for a happy marriage there has to be more than a passionate love. For a lasting union, they insist, there must be a genuine liking for each other. Which, in my book, is a good definition for friendship.” -Marilyn Monroe
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“The heart of marriage is memories and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.” -Bill Cosby
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“There is no subject on which more dangerous nonsense is talked and thought than marriage.” -George Bernard Shaw
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“The details surrounding both my marriage and subsequent filing for divorce are private, and I had hoped to keep them that way for the sake of my family.” -Eminem
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“I tried marriage. I’m 0 for 3 with the marriage thing. So, being a ballplayer – I believe in numbers. I’m not going 0 for 4. I’m not wearing a golden sombrero.” -Charlie Sheen
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“Friendship is two-sided. It isn’t a friend just because someone’s doing something nice for you. That’s a nice person. There’s friendship when you do for each other. It’s like marriage – it’s two-sided.” -John Wooden
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“Having federal officials, whether judges, bureaucrats, or congressmen, impose a new definition of marriage on the people is an act of social engineering profoundly hostile to liberty.” -Ron Paul
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“Marriage is an act of will that signifies and involves a mutual gift, which unites the spouses and binds them to their eventual souls, with whom they make up a sole family – a domestic church.” -Pope John Paul II
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“I think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman.” -Arnold Schwarzenegger
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“My decision to end my marriage was such a risk to lose ratings and lose my fan base. I had to take that risk for my inner peace and to be happy with myself.” -Kim Kardashian
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“Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce.” -Voltaire
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“As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will, he will be sure to repent.” -Socrates
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“How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.” -Oscar Wilde
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“There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage.” -Martin Luther
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“Marriage is the most natural state of man, and… the state in which you will find solid happiness.” -Benjamin Franklin
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“When people get married because they think it’s a long-time love affair, they’ll be divorced very soon, because all love affairs end in disappointment. But marriage is a recognition of a spiritual identity.” -Joseph Campbell
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“I wanted to marry a girl just like my mom.” -Michael Bergin
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“Marriage is a financial contract I have enough contracts already.” -Linda Fiorentino
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“Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.” -John Lyly
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“I’ve had two proposals since I’ve been a widow. I am a wonderful catch, you know. I have a lot of money.” -Ruth Rendell
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“Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.” -Mark Twain
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“There is, hidden or flaunted, a sword between the sexes till an entire marriage reconciles them.” -C. S. Lewis
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“Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage.” -William Shakespeare
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“I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.” -Kinky Friedman
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“The critical period of matrimony is breakfast-time.” -A. P. Herbert
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“The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.” -George Jessel
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“Is there a doctor in the house? My parents want me to marry you.” -Wendy Liebman
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“Married couples who work together to build and maintain a business assume broad responsibilities. Not only is their work important to our local and national economies, but their success is central to the well-being of their families.” -Melissa Bean
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“If it were not for the presents, an elopement would be preferable.” -George Ade
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“Marriage, like money, is still with us and, like money, progressively devalued.” -Robert Graves
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“There’s nothing like a good cheating song to make me want to run home to be with my wife.” -Steven Curtis Chapman
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“Marriage – a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.” -Beverley Nichols
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“Marriage is an exercise in torture.” -Frances Conroy
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“Quarrels often arise in marriages when the bridal gifts are excessive.” -Antisthenes
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“The comfortable estate of widowhood is the only hope that keeps up a wife’s spirits.” -John Gay
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“The only good husbands stay bachelors: They’re too considerate to get married.” -Finley Peter Dunne
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“One was never married, and that’s his hell another is, and that’s his plague.” -Robert Burton
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“I very much feel that marriage is a sacrament and that sacrament should extend… to that legal entity of a union between what traditionally in our Western values has been defined as between a man and a woman.” -Bill Frist
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“I think it’s something that needs to be said – that there are interracial marriages out there, and the couples live happy lives, and there’s nothing wrong with it.” -Tia Mowry
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“Why in almost all societies have married women specialized in bearing and rearing children and in certain agricultural activities, whereas married men have done most of the fighting and market work?” -Gary Becker
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“Marriage, for a woman at least, hampers the two things that made life to me glorious – friendship and learning.” -Jane Harrison
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“If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.” -Alan King
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“I like getting married, but I don’t like being married.” -Don Adams
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“Married people from my generation are like an endangered species!” -Patrice Leconte
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“I enjoy being single, but I loved being married.” -Stephanie Mills
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“In a happy marriage it is the wife who provides the climate, the husband the landscape.” -Gerald Brenan
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“Like everything which is not the involuntary result of fleeting emotion but the creation of time and will, any marriage, happy or unhappy, is infinitely more interesting than any romance, however passionate.” -W. H. Auden
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“Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.” -Lewis Grizzard
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“A so-called happy marriage corresponds to love as a correct poem to an improvised song.” -Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel
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“Marriage, it seems, confines every man to his proper rank.” -Jean de la Bruyere
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“It’s not always been a happy marriage. I guess I wanted a quick fix.” -David Byrne
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“If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.” -Sam Levenson
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“When a marriage works, nothing on earth can take its place.” -Helen Gahagan
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“Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.” -Stephen Leacock
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“For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.” -Catherine Zeta-Jones
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“But, alas! what poor Woman is ever taught that she should have a higher Design than to get her a Husband?” -Mary Astell
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“Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else in the house.” -Jean Kerr
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“I’ve had an exciting time I married for love and got a little money along with it.” -Rose Kennedy
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“Faithful women are all alike, they think only of their fidelity, never of their husbands.” -Jean Giraudoux
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“Take care of him. And make him feel important. And if you can do that, you’ll have a happy and wonderful marriage. Like two out of every ten couples.” -Neil Simon
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“Caesar might have married Cleopatra, but he had a wife at home. There’s always something.” -Will Cuppy
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“I don’t think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance.” -Frank Carson
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“On rare occasions one does hear of a miraculous case of a married couple falling in love after marriage, but on close examination it will be found that it is a mere adjustment to the inevitable.” -Emma Goldman
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“Never feel remorse for what you have thought about your wife she has thought much worse things about you.” -Jean Rostand
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“Love in marriage should be the accomplishment of a beautiful dream, and not, as it too often is, the end.” -Alphonse Karr
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“When I get married, it’ll be no secret.” -Elvis Presley
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“When you have a baby, love is automatic, when you get married, love is earned.” -Marie Osmond
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“Marriage, a market which has nothing free but the entrance.” -Michel de Montaigne
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“Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.” -Ogden Nash
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“Marriage is an attempt to solve problems together which you didn’t even have when you were on your own.” -Eddie Cantor
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“Marriage should be a duet – when one sings, the other claps.” -Joe Murray
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“It takes patience to appreciate domestic bliss volatile spirits prefer unhappiness.” -George Santayana
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“Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.” -Billy Connolly
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“It is a full time job being honest one moment at a time, remembering to love, to honor, to respect. It is a practice, a discipline, worthy of every moment.” -Jasmine Guy
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“Plant and your spouse plants with you weed and you weed alone.” -Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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“They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake.” -Alexander Pope
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“Only choose in marriage a man whom you would choose as a friend if he were a woman.” -Joseph Joubert
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“Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner.” -Charles Caleb Colton
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“Daddy was real gentle with kids. That’s why I expected so much out of marriage, figuring that all men should be steady and pleasant.” -Loretta Lynn
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“Marriage is good for those who are afraid to sleep alone at night.” -St. Jerome
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“Getting divorced just because you don’t love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.” -Zsa Zsa Gabor
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“The true index of a man’s character is the health of his wife.” -Cyril Connolly
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“It destroys one’s nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being.” -Benjamin Disraeli
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“Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automatically deserves great success in any field of activity yet almost everyone believes that he automatically deserves success in marriage.” -Sydney J. Harris
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“Marriage is a bribe to make the housekeeper think she’s a householder.” -Thornton Wilder
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“In marriage there are no manners to keep up, and beneath the wildest accusations no real criticism. Each is familiar with that ancient child in the other who may erupt again. We are not ridiculous to ourselves. We are ageless. That is the luxury of the wedding ring.” -Enid Bagnold
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“All marriages are happy. It’s the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.” -Raymond Hull
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“Marriage may be the closest thing to Heaven or Hell any of us will know on this earth.” -Edwin Louis Cole
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“Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences.” -Isadora Duncan
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“If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you’d have a hell of a lot of overlapping.” -Mignon McLaughlin
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“Marriage is a series of desperate arguments people feel passionately about.” -Katharine Hepburn
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“Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.” -Ambrose Bierce
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“Marrying an old bachelor is like buying second-hand furniture.” -H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
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“Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.” -Gilbert K. Chesterton
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“Well married a person has wings, poorly married shackles.” -Henry Ward Beecher
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“The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.” -Brendan Behan
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“I think women are natural caretakers. They take care of everybody. They take care of their husbands and their kids and their dogs, and don’t spend a lot of time just getting back and taking time out.” -Reese Witherspoon
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“Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.” -Samuel Johnson
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“It’s not beauty but fine qualities, my girl, that keep a husband.” -Euripides
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“Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can’t help but smile on it.” -Josh Billings
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“Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of husbands. Remember all men would be tyrants if they could.” -Abigail Adams
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“Politics doesn’t make strange bedfellows – marriage does.” -Groucho Marx
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“He’s the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.” -Mae West
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“All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner.” -Red Skelton
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“A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it.” -John Steinbeck
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“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” -Erma Bombeck
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“Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing anyone who comes between them.” -Sydney Smith
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“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” -Prince Philip
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“There’s only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I’ll get married again.” -Clint Eastwood
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“There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.” -Homer
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“Love is moral even without legal marriage, but marriage is immoral without love.” -Ellen Key
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“When marrying, ask yourself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this person into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory.” -Friedrich Nietzsche
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“One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again.” -Judith Viorst
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