Curated Quotations

Dennis Miller

Quotations

  • “What’s so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It’s like a shock and aw shucks campaign.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “I’m a comedian, for God’s sake. Viewers shouldn’t trust me. And you know what? They’re hip enough to know they shouldn’t trust me. I’m just doing stand-up comedy.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “Born again?! No, I’m not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “I had fun pretending to be a sportscaster. People always think that was a down thing for me. I had the best job in sports broadcasting for two years.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “I didn’t know my Dad – he moved out early. And my mom’s politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn’t think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I’ve been both in my life.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation’s highways.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “Just put down 9/11… I think, on most things I’m liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I’m kind of conservative on.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “I didn’t know my Dad – he moved out early. And my mom’s politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn’t think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I’ve been both in my life.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “The American education system couldn’t be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.” -Dennis Miller

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  • “I didn’t know my Dad – he moved out early. And my mom’s politics were kind of hardscrabble. She didn’t think about Democrats or Republicans. She thought about who made sense. I’ve been both in my life.” -Dennis Miller

    (click to view listing)

    –

  • “What’s so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It’s like a shock and aw shucks campaign.” -Dennis Miller

    (click to view listing)

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